Post 68

March is NATIONAL PROBLEM GAMBLING AWARENESS MONTH!

During this month of March, watch for the P’s!!

Programs, Posters, PowerPoints, Panel discussions, Papers, Public health announcements, and Press releases on becoming aware of problem gambling …

in one’s family, circle of friends, workplace, church pew, and/or oneself! 

Across the nation, there is a growing awareness of gambling addiction and how this devastating disease is impacting all ages and economic levels … and society, in general.  In keeping with the theme of awareness, this edition of the GRM Blog will highlight the signs and symptoms of problem and compulsive gambling.  It’s not always a condition that’s easy to spot.  Sometimes, problem gambling is masked as “a money problem” or “we [spouses] just don’t get along anymore” or “(s)he’s always late for work and her/his projects are usually late now” or “his/her grades have really slipped and (s)he’s always on edge.”

Here is a listing of symptoms to look for when a person is experiencing problems with gambling:

•     Preoccupied with gambling (i.e., reliving past gambling experiences, planning the

            next venture, or thinking of ways to get money to gamble)
 
       ·         Secretive about his/her gambling habits, and defensive when confronted

·         Increasing bet amounts when gambling in order to achieve the desired excitement

·         Trying unsuccessfully to control, cut back, or stop gambling

·         Restless or irritable when not gambling

·         Gambling to escape problems

·         “Chasing” losses with more gambling

·         Lying to family and others about the extent of gambling

·         Jeopardizing or losing relationships, jobs, education, or career opportunities because of gambling

·         Relying on others to bail him or her out to relieve a desperate financial situation caused by gambling

See references below for help if a gambling problem is indicated by a number of “yes” answers to these problems!

Also, for this month’s GRM Blog, I am pleased to announce that the Mid-Central Alliance on Problem Gambling is holding an Educational Conference that will prove to be of significant assistance to professional problem gambling counselors.  Here are the details!

Time:  Tuesday/Wednesday, March 24 and 25

Location:  Indianapolis, IN at the Holiday Inn, 251 E. Pennsylvania Pkwy.

Register for both days:  www.ipgap.indiana.edu

CEUs granted: 14

FOCUS:   

THE STUDY OF THE ENNEAGRAM

Presented by Renee Siegel, MA, LISAC, NCGC-II

The word “enneagram” refers to a symbol with nine points, referencing nine types of perceptions of reality (personalities) and the movement between them.  The study of the enneagram is very useful in growing your self-awareness, growing tolerance and understanding of others, [and] understanding how we each operate on “automatic pilot”, sometimes even when we don’t want to.  However, when we step back and examine these nine types with nine habitual patterns of thinking, feeling, and doing, we can see ourselves more clearly and make changes.

Finally, plans are continuing for ongoing trainings in Kentucky for the Clergy/Lay Ministers Certification in Gambling Addiction Prevention, Education, Awareness, and Spiritual Outreach Care by the American Compulsive Gambling Counselor Certification Board.  For more information on this new national certification – and how you can register for the trainings AND bring it to your State – contact the American Board at (609)588-9338 or e-mail ccgnjalice@aol.com

Blessings,

Rev. Janet Jacobs

Founding Director
Gambling Recovery Ministries

For more information on help with problem gambling, go to www.gamblersanonymous.org

For Gambling Awareness Month Resources, visit www.npgam.org   You will find the following resources: infographic, resource guide, sample proclamations, press releases, and grassroots media outreach.

For more information on problem gambling and recovery issues, go to www.grmumc.org  

 

For special perspectives on women and problem gambling, visit www.femalegamblers.info/    

Post 67

PROMISE … AND PIONEERS!

It was obviously not a pre-planned, written-out acceptance speech.  The award truly came as a personal surprise.  Standing at the podium in the crowded banquet room,  acceptance words tumbled out - re-gifting the Jim Cooke Leadership Award to all in the room who represent PROMISE to folks seeking help for problem gambling.  Bringing help, hope, and promise (of better days to come) to persons affected, both directly and indirectly, by gambling addiction is, indeed, still a PIONEERING effort in the field of mental health services.  This Award, from the Kentucky Council on Problem Gambling, is an incredible honor to receive … and yet, there’s more behind this very special distinction for which I am most grateful.  

As accurately as I can, I am – now for this February Posting - composing my acceptance “speech” in bulleted form, along with italicized, background information (from the KYCPG website www.kycpg.org ).  You will see that themes of “Promise” and “Pioneers”, likewise, continue to run through the outreach work of the Kentucky Council.

·         First, each person present at the Kentucky Council’s Awards Luncheon (of the 16^th Annual Education and Awareness Conference on Problem Gambling) serves as a “beacon of promise” through knowledge gained and shared through learning conferences about problem gambling and how recovery can truly come.

KYCPG’s Goals and Strategies: Goal – To provide education and training programs on problem gambling throughout Kentucky.  Strategy – To ensure the continued development of training programs that enhance knowledge of the issue of problem gambling.  Twice annually, the Council hosts Education and Awareness Conferences, with a number of scholarships offered for each event. 

·         This promise, portrayed via hope and help, is extended to those who – initially – have not sensed any promise for a different and better life.  Their existence has been that of failure, shame, and tremendous pain.   


The Kentucky Council on Problem Gambling encourages individuals to become Certified Compulsive Gambling Counselors.  Although professionally counseling compulsive gamblers shares many aspects of professional counseling of other addictions and disorders, there are some critically important differences.  Without familiarity of and understanding how to address those differences, the attempt at counseling the compulsive gambler can be unsuccessful.  Working in cooperation with the state Division of Behavioral Health, KYCPG has helped increased the number of certified counselors in Kentucky.Also, the Council has presented an Exam Preparation Workshop to encourage counselors to seek certification by the American Compulsive Gambling Counselor Certification Board.

·         Second, we are a gathering – here and now – of “true pioneers”!  It is exciting work … opening new doors of recovery to many individuals who feel isolated in their addiction due to inadequate care - and who experience the sting of marginalization from others ready to minimize their afflictions or point the finger of shame. 

The Kentucky Council was founded 20 years ago!

It began as the vision of Curtis L. Barrett, Ph.D., professor emeritus, University of Louisville [who] saw in his teaching and practice that pathological gambling (then known as compulsive gambling) was an existing concern for Kentucky, and that action was needed to raise awareness of the issue among the citizenry, with governments and even inside the gambling industry, itself. 

Moreover …

KYCPG was the founding council of the MidCentral Alliance on Problem Gambling, which also includes the state councils on problem gambling affiliated with the National Council on Problem Gambling in Illinois, Indiana, Michigan, Minnesota, Ohio, West Virginia, and Wisconsin 

·         In journeying new paths and creating new concepts, as pioneers we will face obstacles and even opposition.  We find it is often tough setting an unexplored  pace and direction.  Colleagues may hesitate to understand where we are going, continue to hold onto comfortable, familiar perspectives, or keep their doors closely guarded.  We may even begin to feel that our clients are not the only ones marginalized! 

Still, our own country was settled by pioneers – from the beginning!  Yes, creating those new doors of recovery is groundbreaking and, sometimes, lonely work.  But as history tells us, this work is worth it … and as GA and Gam-Anon members proclaim, You [you and those who seek help for problem gambling] are worth it!  We are all people of worth – and assisting folks into recovery is an incredibly, significant way to remind them of their own unique worthiness.

Therefore, I express in humble gratitude to you, Members of the Kentucky Council on Problem Gambling and Council Director Mike Stone, my deep Thank You for this very special award … and for the pioneering leadership you continue to and have provided for these many years … in extending help and hope … and the embodiment of promise for recovery to all affected by problem gambling. 

Blessings,

Rev. Janet Jacobs
Founding Director
Gambling Recovery Ministries

For more information on problem gambling and recovery issues, visit www.grmumc.org

For information and registration details for the MidCentral Conference on Problem Gambling, on March 24-25, in Indianapolis, go to www.indianaproblemgambling.org

Member organizations of the MidCentral Alliance include:

·         · Indiana Council on Problem Gambling    www.indianaproblemgambling.org

• Illinois Council on Problem Gambling    www.icpg.info

·           Indiana Division of Mental Health & Addiction    www.state.in.us 

·           Indiana Prevention Resource Center        www.drugs.indiana.edu 

·           Kentucky Council on Problem Gambling   www.kycpg.org   

·           Michigan Association on Problem Gambling  www.michapg.com   

·           Northstar Alliance on Problem Gambling.org (Minnesota)      www.northstarproblemgambling.org 

·           Problem Gambling Network of Ohio www.pgnohio.org   

·           Kentucky Behavioral Health & Development and Intellectual Disabilities     www.dbhdid.ky.gov/kdbhdid/default.asp  

·           Wisconsin Council on Problem Gambling   www.wi-gamblers.org 

·           Gambling Recovery Ministries    www.grmumc.org  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Post 66

Back Then  ...  at least,  10 Years Ago

This month, I gave a presentation to teachers, all members of an honorary organization of women educators.  The program was entitled, TEEN GAMBLING: An Emerging Concern for a Healthier America. The PowerPoint was an updated version of one I had presented at a United Methodist sponsored 2008 national conference, in the Washington, D.C., area.  As I reviewed the slides' details, I marveled at two realities: (1)  the statistics for teen gambling, at the turn of the 21st century, were and presently are similarly alarming;  and  (2)  the early cautions concerning youth involvement in internet betting (and like endeavors) bear even deeper depths of warning now!

To illustrate the above, take note of the following statements circa 1998- 2004.

•  1998 Louisiana State University Study of Problem Gambling in the State of Indiana:  Survey of Indiana Adolescents in Grades 6-12 ... Problem Gambling Rate: 11.2%; Compulsive Gambling Rate: 7.5%
• Year 2000:  In a recent review of 14 U.S. and 6 Canadian Adolescent Gambling Studies, researchers found that in the past 10 years, the number of teenagers ages 12 to 17 reporting serious gambling problems has increased by 50%.  The age of onset for gambling has dropped so that now throughout America, the majority of 12 year-olds have already gambled. (Jacobs 2000) 
• March 2001:  The American Psychiatric Association issued a mental health advisory on Internet gambling and addiction, with a special emphasis on the dangers for young people.
• 2003 Nebraska Risk & Protective Factor Student Survey:  Of the students who had gambled, the most common age to begin is 10 or younger for both genders;  ... 80-90% parents report knowing their children gamble for money and do not object. 
• 2005: National Council on Problem Gambling ... 30-45% of college students gamble on a weekly basis ... 8% of college-age adults are pathological gamblers

So where are we now?  Continuously, over the years, I hear similar reports to those above.  It seems that within every professional conference on problem gambling that I attend, there is a call for additional and ongoing research, plus societal awareness of youth gambling. 

With this said, I want to share again, in the spirit of awareness, information on the January 29-30 Kentucky Council on Problem Gambling Annual Education and Awareness Conference and the January 30 - February 1 Lexington GA/Gam-Anon Mini-Conference.

UPDATE ON CLERGY/LAY MINISTERS CERTIFICATION TRAININGS In collaboration with the Kentucky Council on Problem Gambling, initial Training Sessions for the  Clergy/Lay Ministers Certification (sponsored by the  American Compulsive Gambling Counselor Certification Board) will take place before and during the Kentucky Council's 18th Annual Problem Gambling Educational and Awareness Conference on January 29-30, 2015.  The Conference will be held at the Clarion Hotel in Lexington, KY  (I-64/75 at Newtown Pike, Lexington).  These sessions will compose the beginning segment of the required curriculum for national certification.

Clergy/Lay Ministers Certification Sessions will begin on Thursday, January 29 at 9:00 AM at the Clarion.  The Conference begins, also, on Thursday  ... at 1:00 and continues until Friday at 5:00 PM. 
** ALSO, if you are planning to attend the Clergy/Lay Ministers training sessions (beginning Thursday morning), PLEASE INDICATE THIS ON YOUR KENTUCKY CONFERENCE REGISTRATION.

 Registration details for the Conference can be found on the Kentucky Council's website at
www.kycpg.org  and/or by contacting the Council's Executive Director Mike Stone at kmstone@mis.net

Hotel room group rate deadline is January 8.  Make room reservations to jgunsten@clarionhotellex.com 

50 Scholarships are available for the $100 registration fee and one night's lodging. Apply to kmstone@mis.net   Application for scholarship application is January 5.

Along with the Clergy/Lay Ministers Certification Training Sessions (Trainers, Curtis Barrett, Ph.D. and Rev. Janet Jacobs), other highlights of the Conference feature topics on Sports Gambling (Speakers, Tom Brew and Rick Benson), Prevention Efforts (Speaker, Julie Hynes), PTSD, Military, & Gambling (Speaker, Jose Flores), PTSD & Veterans (Speaker, Dr. Lionel Phelps), and Problem Gambling Awareness in Eastern Kentucky Research (Speaker, Rev. Scott Hunt, Ph.D.).   

For information on the Lexington GA/Gam-Anon Mini-Conference on January 30-February 1 at the Clarion Hotel in Lexington, visit www.gamblersanonymous.org  This open conference begins at 5:30, on Friday, January 30, with a Joint Reception (refreshments) with the Kentucky Council on Problem Gambling and the Mini-Conference participants. 

I close this month's GRM Blog with a certain and ominous conclusion from the 2003 Nebraska Survey (see above): 

With the increase in gambling in the U.S., the true impact on youth will likely take years to realize.

Amen!

Blessings,

Rev. Janet Jacobs
Founding Director
Gambling Recovery Ministries

For more information on problem gambling and recovery issues, visit www.grmumc.org








               

Post 65

GIFT RESPONSIBLY!

Earlier this month, at the American Board's Clergy/Lay Ministers Certification Training in New Jersey, our presenter of clinical curriculum spoke about "gifting responsibly" ... that is, being mindful of the age-appropriateness factor when giving presents to children.  He shared that as a child on family vacations, he and his brother would each be given money for a roll of arcade tickets - to last for the week.  However, by the first day's closing, he  - unlike his brother - would have spent all of his money!  The rush, the thrill, the excitement of winning (or almost winning) was far too tempting to keep on spending rather than to parcel out tickets for each day.  

This month of December finds many folks spending and spending.  It seems the "season of gift-giving" can occupy the mind - and wallet!  Finances stretched; time spent shopping (and fighting traffic); angst over how much to give whom ... YES, definitely, we can make a point on each topic concerning how we approach and carry out gifting others.  And they all have a great deal to say about healthy perspectives and responses.  Yet there's another angle to gifting responsibly when it comes to problem gambling and recovery issues. 

Sometimes, adults gift children in ways they would enjoy receiving.  The present might be something they had hoped for as a child or now as an adult.  Yes, you guessed it, how about lottery tickets or scratch-offs.  Of course, the child cannot cash in a winning ticket - but the grown-up can.  Unfortunately, often these thoughts do not go beyond that point.  However, it's a serious argument to say that giving such opportunities to minors to gamble can set in motion hopes, aspirations, and/or feelings of excitement to a mind not ready to understand the reality of gambling as only a chance (not a certainty) for winning.   

Therefore, December's GRM Blog carries a Press Release from the National Council on Problem Gambling.  Below are the first three paragraphs of the article.  For the full report, go to www.problemgambling.com  It is a timely reminder for us to give responsibly!

STUFF STOCKINGS RESPONSIBLY

If you give a lottery product as a gift, please make sure you keep the person's age in mind.  Studies suggest that gambling remains a popular activity among youth and adolescents who receive lottery tickets as gifts tend to begin gambling earlier in life - a possible risk factor for more severe gambling problems.  Researchers have also reported a correlation between age of gambling onset and problem gambling.

This information, along with the concern about adolescent problem gambling, has prompted the National Council on problem Gambling (NCPG) and the International Centre for Youth Gambling Problems and High-Risk Behaviors at McGill University as well as dozens of lottery corporations around the globe to collaborate in the annual Holiday Campaign aimed at increasing public awareness about the impact of gifting lottery products to underage minors.

NCPG Executive Director Keith Whyte explained that it's vital to raise awareness because research has shown that some problem gamblers report beginning gambling during childhood - as early as 9-10 years of age.  "The Holiday Campaign is a way to remind people that they can keep the fun in the holidays by gifting lottery tickets responsibly to adults."

UPDATE ON CLERGY/LAY MINISTERS CERTIFICATION TRAININGS

In collaboration with the Kentucky Council on Problem Gambling, initial Training Sessions for the  Clergy/Lay Ministers Certification (sponsored by the  American Compulsive Gambling Counselor Certification Board) will take place before and during the Kentucky Council's 16th Annual Problem Gambling Educational and Awareness Conference on January 29-30, 2015.  The Conference will be held at the Clarion Hotel in Lexington, KY  (I-64/75 at Newtown Pike, Lexington).  These sessions will compose the beginning segment of the required curriculum for national certification.

Clergy/Lay Ministers Certification Sessions will begin on Thursday, January 29 at 9:00 AM at the Clarion.  The Conference begins, also, on Thursday  ... at 1:00 and continues until Friday at 5:00 PM. 

Registration details for the Conference can be found on the Kentucky Council's website at
www.kycpg.org

Hotel room group rate deadline is January 8.  Make room reservations to jgunsten@clarionhotellex.com 

50 Scholarships are available for the $100 registration fee and one night's lodging. Apply to kmstone@mis.net   Application for scholarship application is January 5.  

ALSO, if you are planning to attend the Clergy/Lay Ministers training sessions (beginning Thursday morning), PLEASE INDICATE THIS ON YOUR KENTUCKY CONFERENCE REGISTRATION.

For information on the Lexington GA/Gam-Anon Mini-Conference on January 30-February 1 at the Clarion Hotel in Lexington, visit www.gamblersanonymous.org  

I hope to see many of you next month in Lexington!

Blessings,

Rev. Janet Jacobs
Founding Director
Gambling Recovery Ministries


For more information on problem gambling and recovery issues, go to www.grmumc.org


 




  

Post 64

Clergy/Lay Ministers Certification Trainings:
Off and Running ... with More to Come!

Training is now in place - and going on - for the brand-new Clergy/Lay Ministers Certification in Gambling Addiction Prevention, Education, Awareness, and Spiritual Outreach Care!  This national Certification is a pioneering project of the American Compulsive Gambling Counselor Certification Board that specifically addresses the role of clergy and lay ministers, within faith-based settings, to provide the most effective first responder care to individuals impacted by problem gambling.

The American Board's vision for this program is nationwide in scope!  Imagine:  trained and certified faith leaders - of all faiths - who are bridging the gaps between those seeking help and treatment resources and support groups.  It's a huge vision ... but one that's not too large for the oldest national certifying gambling counselor certification board in the country!

The initial pilot training program is currently underway in New Jersey.  Modules 1 and 2 have already taken place and the final training Modules 3 and 4 are scheduled for December 2 and 3. The classes take place at St. James Church, 115 E. Delaware Ave., Pennington, NJ (in Trenton Area) from 8:45 AM - 4:00 PM. 

It is not too late to register for Modules 3 and 4!  Each Module is self-contained; and additional re-runs of these trainings will be scheduled in the future.  Contact the American Board for registration information at (609) 588-9338.

Furthermore, plans are in the making for the Trainings to come to Kentucky - in January!  In collaboration with the Kentucky Council on Problem Gambling, initial segments of the Clergy/Lay Ministers trainings will be scheduled during the Kentucky Council's Annual Education Conference in Lexington (Clarion Hotel) on January 29-30.  More information will be forthcoming so check GRM's December and January Blog Postings!  Also, contact the Kentucky Council's Director Mike Stone at (502) 223-1823 for details on the January Conference.

Then too, the Gamblers Anonymous/Gam-Anon Lexington Mini Conference will take place at the Clarion on January 31-February 1. This is an "Open" event, filled with information on recovery from compulsive gambling; and the welcome mat is extended to all!  The phone number for the Lexington GA Help Line is (855) 222-5542.

Join with me, please, in thanksgiving for this special clergy/lay ministers certification program ... for its expanding outreach, and the real difference trained and certified, faith-based first responders can make!

Blessings,

Rev. Janet Jacobs
Founding Director
Gambling Recovery Ministries

For more information on problem gambling and recovery issues, go to www.grmumc.org



             

Post 63

FEAR: Is It Sealing Your Fate?

Here in Midwest USA, we are enjoying the height of autumn: brilliant colors of red, orange, and golden foliage, apple orchards ripe for the picking, cool - yet sunny - crisp days, and fresh pumpkin pies.  The Halloween holiday is fast approaching and little trick-or-treaters dressed in costume will be ringing doorbells with their sacks opened wide for more candy.  It was a favorite holiday for me during elementary school days.  My identity masked, I could sit anywhere in the classroom and celebrate (for a short time) being someone - or something - else.  Rarely though, were my classmates fooled as my height usually gave me away. 

 Most of the spookiness attached to Halloween was in fun and not scary at all.  However, there was a notable exception.  During my freshman year in college, several very creative members of my young adult ministry organization decided to conduct a haunted house tour of their own.  It was just for us - not a public event ... and the only one I knew of in the Toledo area.  Driving past the outskirts of town and down a lonely country road was creepy enough ...  but when we came upon a solitary figure garbed in full-length shepherd’s robe and shadowed face, the fright began.  We knew better to be truly scared – however, the newness of our adventure and the anticipation of unknown happenings stretching before us did give us more than a taste of fear.  We weren’t sure we really wanted to step into this unmet-before arena!        

As I revisit that haunted house experience, I must admit – yes - that even though I knew no harm would take place, there were actual moments of surprising fright.  Then too, there was, indeed, a fear of the unknown as the tour continued.

Likewise, in our journeys of recovery (all kinds), the future – without the companionship of active addiction and/or reliance upon old, familiar coping behaviors – can be seen as a frightening place to enter.

So what are we talking about?  Fear?  Yes.  Courage?  Again, yes.  Actually, it’s about facing one’s fear of re-entry, so to speak, as a recovering person – solely armed with brand new skills and lessons from therapy and/or 12 Step group support.  BUT … why then, the fear? (And it can be sensed as real fear too.)  Once more, and sadly, the terror of facing life without the old companions (addictive/self-abuse responses) can hold back progress in recovery.   

Basically, the flip side of fear is courage … the stepping ahead, the moving forward, the no-turning-back.  In his book, Three Steps to Integrity, the Reverend Dr. Bill Jenkins details an entire section on courage.  In response to the five common fears listed below, I am including supporting thoughts (italicized) shared by Dr. Jenkins, as well as other practical suggestions. 

Five Common Fears in Facing New Life in Recovery

(1)   What will I do to fill my time when I am no longer ________?  I’ll need to find new interests but I don’t know where to begin.  If I have too much free (empty) time, I’ll get bored – and that’s a sure ticket to _____________.  What if I try new hobbies and don’t like them?  What if they’re too expensive?  What if there’s nothing to do, etc., etc.?

Short term goals are often stepping stones, or intermediate steps, toward achieving a long term goal. (WLJ)

Fill spare time with multiple and accomplishable tasks and activities.  Eventually, you will achieve a balance of things to do and enjoy, in your spare time.        

(2)  What if I fail?  Feeling failure will just sink me deeper into my depression.  Then I’ll seek comfort by _________ and then I’ll feel more like a failure.

Courage includes perseverance, continuing to seek a goal in the midst of opposition, obstacles, discouragement and even failure. (WLJ)

If you experience a slip, get back on the one-day-at-a-time wagon.  Return to the ways of recovery (again, take each day as it comes)  – attending support meetings, checking back with the counselor, reading recovery material, and counting on your Higher Power for help.

(3)  I’ll lose my identity … I actually like to/find pleasure in  _____________.  My self –image is that of a ____________; and I can escape to this other “life” and be “myself”.

Plato placed an emphasis on being rather than just doing.  Morality stems from your character identity, rather than being a reflection of the actions alone.  (WLJ)

This is a toughie.  How intertwined we can be with an image we have come to adopt – actions and all.  Has this identity associated with __________  given you a perceived sense of  strength and valor …  helped you to lose shyness and be social and, perhaps, feel glamorous … OR simply enabled you to claim a personal identity when there seemed to be none?

Untangling one’s self from the ___________ identity, in reality, opens the door to hard and consistent recovery work … but it’s worth it!  Find others successfully  in recovery; learn from them; notice how they value themselves AND how they value you for yourself ! 

(4)  I’ll lose my friends … how can I find new ones?

Counselors know from experience that many people are unhappy because they expect their spouse, children, or employer to “make them happy”.  No person or thing can make you happy.  You are the only one who can make you happy.  That can only happen when you have inner wholeness, peace, and integrity.  (WLJ)

The 12^th Step in the Gamblers Anonymous Recovery Program (paraphrased) calls for the recovering gambler to pass on the message of hope and help to those in need of recovery from compulsive gambling.  Commonly, we hear the saying that by helping others, we receive more of a blessing than those receiving help.  Service to others plays a significant role in recovery; and working alongside others, in service, provides an arena wherein new friendships are made.

(5)  Can I really lose this FEAR that rules my life?  What if my family never trusts me again?  What if my friends never forgive me?  What if I never get out of debt?  What if I lose my job?  What if I wind up in a treatment center?  What IF?  What IF?  What IF?

A more modern context of courage involves things such as overcoming addictive habits, irrational anxieties, and negative co-dependent relationships. … Dr. Theodore Malloch wrote, “Virtues are seen at their most admirable in adversity, when they seal the fate of the one who has them.  We know this from the virtue of courage…” (Malloch, Theodore R., Doing Virtuous Business: The Remarkable Success of Spiritual Enterprise, Thomas Nelson, Inc. 2011; also quoted in Three Steps to Integrity, The ABC Model, William L. Jenkins, Xulon Press, 2012, p.67)

As the expression goes, borrowing trouble describes our What ifs as they project both present and past fears into tomorrow - and the days beyond.  Yes, healthy anticipations and concerns about the future need to be considered and accompanied by appropriate responses.   Worry that never ceases, however, preoccupies the mind … and harbors a seeking of relief, often in unhealthy ways. 

The bottom line to all of the above “fears” is this: Do you allow things you cannot do (out of fear, or for some other reason) prevent you from doing the things you should in order to experience and grow in recovery?

Blessings,

 

Rev. Janet Jacobs

Founding Director

Gambling Recovery Ministries

For more information on the 12 Steps to Recovery Program, go to www.gamblersanonymous.org

To visit the Christ Ministry Center website, in San Diego, and read further articles by Dr. Bill Jenkins, go to www.ChristSD.com

For more information on problem gambling and recovery issues, visit www.grmumc.org

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Post 62

A SLIP:  Up Front and Personal

If you have kept up with the GRM Blog this summer, you will know that I suffered a foot fracture almost four months ago.  Recovery has been going well ... lots of pain, at first, and big-time swelling.  Gradually, the tenderness subsided and my sasquatch paw has taken the shape and appearance of its right-side companion.  

Walking is comfortable now and every day, I'm feeling stronger and stronger ... so much so that my gait is back to normal and I frequently forget to - purposefully - watch my step.  Therein, lies the problem!  Sometimes, when things are starting to feel almost normal again, we may be tempted to replace our precautionary, recovery-mindsets with actions/thoughts that could very well be counterproductive to a complete return to health and wholeness. 

Take my friend's advice for me to hold onto the stairway railing always.  So the slip came. Yes, it was only one step ... but as I clutched the railing, I thought of what could result from such a misstep.  Somewhat shaken and safely seated in the family room, I then formulated some essential lessons-learned  to put back on my radar screen.  They are lessons for me; but perhaps, these barebone basics will provide wisdom and forethought for any of you in the process of recovery (for any reason!).  

This is what I am re-learning:

• When I think I'm safe to return to "normal", I need to be cautious of quick, automatic responses (maybe I can ...  but maybe not: be deliberate and think!)
• Think about those automatic responses: were they ever safe or wise?
• Are friends/family members repeatedly cautioning me about the same actions? (they actually could have a valid point) 
• Were there mini-slips (or maxi-slips) prior to the most recent one?  Have I reminded myself previously to watch out about certain actions and/or thoughts?
• After the slip, I have needed to re-plug into my getting well mindset ... and vigilantly keep it plugged in.
• Re-evaluate the situation: author new lessons-learned ... and follow them!

The Gamblers Anonymous Yellow Book (p. 17) reminds recovering gamblers to be - and stay - alert.  "Don't test or tempt yourself.  Don't associate with acquaintances who gamble.  Don't go in or near gambling establishments.  Don't gamble for anything."  This is true wisdom for the recovering gambler!  And yet, there's more ...  I close now with the final piece of advice from page 17:

Be patient!  The days and weeks will pass soon enough, and as you continue to attend meetings and abstain from gambling, your recovery will really accelerate.      Amen!

Blessings,

Rev. Janet Jacobs
Founding Director
Gambling Recovery Ministries

For more information on the Gamblers Anonymous 12 Step Program of Recovery, go to www.gamblersanonymous.org .  Also, information on Gam-Anon, for family members, friends, and/or associates of problem gamblers can be found at www.gam-anon.org   

For more information on problem gambling and recovery issues, visit www.grmumc.org