Indeed … A Blessed Christmas to You!
In recent years, it seems that each December presents me with conversations about the upcoming holiday season. Yes, words of excitement and joyful anticipation are spoken – at times. However, it is, certainly, not uncommon to hear personal laments concerning the rush-rush-rush to amass gifts, decorations, and rich holiday foods.
In the midst of it all, I recall the Christmas, several years ago, when my father died. Unexpectedly Dad, almost 93 years old, broke his hip and passed on a few days later, right before Christmas. Hit by a monster blizzard, unexpectedly (again) conducting my own father’s funeral service, travel plans drastically altered … I didn’t care if there weren’t any decorations, stockings, tree, fruitcake, or even cookies. The calendar contained the date December 25 but it was like no other 12/25 experienced before.
That year reminded me, continuously, as we ploughed through the holiday season, of others – known and unknown – who suffer tragedy within their daily lives – regardless of any special date. Unfortunately, many folks are not immune to debilitating difficulties brought on by dysfunction. Families touched by addiction may even dread holidays deemed by society to be filled with happiness and love.
The families of compulsive gamblers (not yet in recovery) may very well anticipate the shutting off of electricity instead of a brightly lit Christmas tree. A loved one may be in prison for gambling offenses. A loved one may chose to gamble and not participate in a holiday event or gathering. Sadness, anger, fear … all may reign in the lives of those affected by compulsive gambling.
How then, can life be lived … special times remain special … blessings (of all kinds) be experienced – when dysfunction from compulsive gambling reaches into and impacts the lives of wives, husbands, children, siblings, and friends? Humbly, I offer the following suggestions – and pray that they may be of special help.
- Contact Gam-Anon Phone: (718) 352-1671 and
Web Site: http://www.gam-anon.org/ for specific advice and real-life consultation with persons directly affected by compulsive gambling. They know what you are experiencing and they truly care. - Ask for spiritual help. Consult with a clergy person and ask specifically for prayer.
- Be deliberate about involving all family members in a holiday project – especially one with a giving-to-others nature. Working in a community soup kitchen, reading together holiday literature selected at the library, or just saying holiday greetings to persons met in public: thus barriers of self-imposed isolation and feelings of aloneness can be broken.
- Tailor-make limits and boundaries ahead of the special holiday so that expectations will be realistic to your setting. Don’t compare. Find excitement in celebrating your own unique context.
- Look for and find the spiritual essence of your celebration. Attend a special service. Read holy literature. Say prayers for each other.
May God, indeed, bless you with divine love that affirms, strengthens, and brings you peace!
Rev. Janet Jacobs
Director, Gambling Recovery Ministries
