Post
109
September
is Recovery Month … for the others
too!
Why
do I need to attend a meeting? I’m not
the one who lost our savings. I don’t
keep all hours of the night in unknown places.
I go to family gatherings and certainly don’t miss important
events! Lies, lies, lies: that’s all I
hear! Commonly, these
are the thoughts and words spoken by the
others – family members and friends impacted by a love one’s disordered
gambling. They are often expressed when
a person attends their first few meetings of Gam-Anon – the support
organization for family and friends of problem gamblers.
Of course!
Anger, fear, anxiety, denial and even guilt, sadly, have taken over
those highly impacted by the addiction of a loved one or close associate. Most likely, reality in their world is deeply
changed from what it had been. A
stranger has now entered the relationship.
Communication is strained, guarded, and often filled with two-way
accusations. Addiction’s illness
orchestrates their lives. The gambler’s
compulsion has to bet. The others
obsess over the known and unknown dangers of instability and distrust. Will their lives ever return to “normal”
again?
The
others upon first attending the fellowship of Gam-Anon may
be shocked to hear folks talking about their individual recoveries: that is, recovery
from living a life filled with fear, anger, denial, and guilt. The members speak, instead, of serenity,
faith in their High Power’s wisdom, and trusting themselves. There’s acceptance of reality – and courage
to forge ahead following the 12 Steps to Recovery. Instead of denying the
dangers of ever present addiction, they make tough decisions to preserve their
family and their own sanity. The “what ifs”
of an anxiety-ridden world no longer reign in a new one-day-at-a-time present. The
compulsive gambler may live a secret life of addiction; but the Gam-Anon member
works his/her program of serenity to deal with the concrete realities of
survival and recovery.
Gam-Anon
International Service Office has a treasure trove of great reads for
persons impacted by a loved one’s disordered gambling; and their 52 Gam-Anon Meditations is superb! Check out www.gam-anon.org,
email at gamanonoffice@gam-anon.org, or call (718) 352-1671.
One
more recommendation:
the Indiana Council on Problem Gambling will be presenting the INDIANA FALL DISORDERED GAMBLING TRAINING
EVENT FOCUSING ON THE FAMILY on October 24-25 at the
Lawrenceburg (Indiana) Event Center.
This is a FREE event offering up to 13 CEU’s. Keynote speaker is Bea Aikens, founder of Lanie’s Hope, a national advocacy group
dedicated to illuminating and humanizing the disease of disordered
gambling. For registration information,
call (317) 632-1364 or e-mail christinagray@indianaproblemgambling.org. Registration
will be open soon and space is limited for this excellent conference!
May this month of September be RECOVERY month for ALL!
Blessings,
Rev. Janet Jacobs,
CCGSO
Founding Director
Gambling Recovery
Ministries
For
more information on problem gambling and recovery issues, visit:
